(Ed.'s Note: Once in a while we run into a piece that is clever, well written, and speaks to a viewpoint rarely seen in the genre of legal writing. Take, for example, the analogy First Amendment attorney Floyd Abrams [Pentagon Papers, Nebraska Press Association, Landmark Communications, etc.] draws in Speaking Freely that appearing as lead counsel before the United States Supreme Court [SCOTUS], is like baseball. This is rich. Enjoy.)
Argument:
Appearing before the Supreme Court as chief counsel in a significant case often reminds me of taking the field in a strangely transformed sort of baseball game.
Counsel who is arguing walks to home plate, the podium in the Court which faces the nine justices.
As in baseball (and baseball uniquely among our sports), the batter is alone, confronted by all nine fielders, the Supreme Court, the fielders are also pitchers, each of them throwing questions at his or her own pace, sometimes one after another, sometimes nearly simultaneously.
Balls thrown by each of the nine pass one another in the air, some pitched hard, fast, and straight; others high and inside, obviously designed to keep the lawyer/batter from digging in too comfortably at the plate.
Some of the questions are curve balls, sinkers, and virtually unhittable knuckleballs. But the lawyer/batter must hit them all cleanly, and if he/she does not, the game may be lost on a single pitch alone. An added fillip is that the nine pitchers are also the umpires.
As a result, however wild their pitches may be, they must be treated as strikes.